A Time To Say Goodbye

We have many times in life when we have to say goodbye. Kids leaving home, friends/relationships moving or deciding to move on, pets going over the pet rainbow bridge when they die. Everything that we say goodbye to leaves footprints in our lives.

 

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This last while has had some emotional times for my family. This week I had to say goodbye to a fur family member. Our little Chinchilla, we did a ritual of cleaning the place he had hung out for 10 or 11 years, that is when we got him. We think he was older than the dog who is 16, that is an old life for a Chinchilla. Having plans to deal with unexpected pet stuff.

Sometimes when we say goodbye we have a flood of emotions. When I had to say goodbye to our little friend, I felt sad, angry, worried and lost. The vet was kind and gentle, I was so grateful.

Sad and angry, I could not help our little fellow’s foot, so much effort was put into helping him. We had been trying for 4 months to heal the foot infection. Medications, foot soaks and bandaging. Goodbye little guy, you left footprints in our hearts.

Our little buddy Photo taken by me.

The poor fellow started to equate us with pain and discomfort and the people that gave him food pellet ammo. Crazy guy would pick up his food with one paw (hand like), take one bite and toss it, sometimes at us!

We also had a family member move out, it is very different to have just us and 2 pets. Sometimes people go and you don’t get to say good luck!

During the pandemic I had a friend move on, just stopped answering my calls. I had a sad time in my head in the beginning of the lock down in my area, so my guess is that my mind’s state was too heavy for them to hold. I was so sad to disconnect from that friend but people need to do what they need to do that takes care of their heart. 

My partner had to say goodbye to being at the office, this was hard. Loss of connections, loss of the equipment that made the job easier, and coffee made in a pot. All one had to do was walk to it and pour in a cup with sugar and stuff if you wanted, if they were desperate then pour straight from the pot into the mouth! That was the Monday after a long weekend!

The  indigenous people all over have lost family and not been able to say goodbye. In Canada we had a number of unmarked graves of 215 children found, sadly the families were not notified. This made me so sad. Many nations have felt the pain and loss of many elements of their background, religions and cultures.

Many of the goodbyes were not planned so no proper goodbyes could be exchanged. Dealing with unplanned goodbyes leave holes, if it was that Monday after the long weekend the coffee would fall out of the holes. This means we need ways to mend.

Being human has a lots of room to grow, heal and move forward. How do you say goodbye?

Emotions of a Pandemic

Have you been feeling the drain of this pandemic? Some are worried about coming in contact with someone that might be holding the virus. Some worry their rights are being taken away.  Others have it set that it is not so bad. There are people with all kinds of emotions and worries. I’m concerned about the long term emotional state people will be in with reduced contact and  people being on alert all the time. Ways to help you manage with pandemic fatigue.

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We are dealing with less structure and more formalities. Many of us have pandemic fatigue and burn out. I see it in the elderly and in the young, I see it in the rebels and conformists. We all are tired. The people that have been out of work or modified work settings. Working from home, zoom calls the constant state of being ‘on’. For all teachers and students that do online studies, learning new technologies or dealing with the emotional and fundamental challenges.

My family had many work changes. One lost a job at a restaurant, one had changed and reduced hours, some are working from home and my career changed all together!

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People have not been able to do recreational things like swimming or vacations. Even things like medical appointments and rehabilitation have been changed. Always needing to wash our hands or use hand sanitizer. If you are going anywhere remembering your mask. 

Then the people that almost shun any that need to not wear a mask. The emotions and anger build. I have noted that people are way more frustrated 

How we once dealt with stress has changed, now we are having a very hard time coping. We miss our friends and our outings, we miss how life was.

One of the things I’m finding no matter how you view this pandemic we all have a point that we see it from. We have it splashed all over our social media, if you’re in public, you see the signs, you see the billboard, at the middle of the pandemic in Canada, even our parks/playground were not accessible. Much of the world was confined to their homes, not even allowed to go to the market to buy groceries. It is affecting places of worship and clubs. People feel lonely. Any with borderline functioning mental health challenges are falling in harder and the in person help that was a massive outlet for many is now a phone or video appointment. 

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So for those that would like to take in some of the physical things, There are many pools and gyms that are booking times with people. Just phone your local places and ask what the protocol is for whatever you would like to be part of. I was surprised that so many things were still able to accommodate. In The summer of 2020 we were even able to meet our family from a different household at a restaurant, we called the restaurant ahead of time and asked if we could have tables that allowed us to social distance and still see each other, they made that happen. We had a safer meal out, thank you to Denny’s!

What can you do to ease the blahs of the pandemic?

Find new music

Cook a new recipe

Treat yourself to a ordered in meal or do take out

Call someone/send a card or a letter

Watch a funny movie or show or a virtual play

Online puzzles

Try an online tour of something that interests you.

Get rid of 5 things you no longer use.

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Be kind to yourself, we sadly don’t know when this will end, we are in this world together lets be kind to yourself and others. If you’re having a hard time please seek help. You are valuable.